HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST, November 12^th, 2012

5 Ways to Show Appreciation.

 Everyone likes to feel appreciated. Don't wait for your anniversary or your spouse's birthday to let your mate know how grateful you feel to have your spouse in your life.

 Five Ways to Show Your Appreciation

 Author Karen Leland suggests the following five ways to show appreciation:

 •1. Be specific.

 •2. Make it about character.

 •3. Drop a line; draft a note.

 •4. Be sincere.

 •5. Turnaround is fair play.

 

Bottom line, on a regular basis, write a note that mentions something you admire or appreciate about your spouse. Keep it sincere, personal, and specific!

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST, November 9^th, 2012

The Benefits of Walking Together:

 

The benefits of walking on a regular basis are well documented. Many walkers believe that walking is not only good for their hearts and bodies, walking is also good for their marriage.

 One step after another, walking together is a great way to connect with each other.

 

Reasons to Walk Together

• Walking is good exercise for both of you.

• Walking together gives the two of you some time alone, or if you take the kids with you, time outdoors as a family.

• Walking together provides time to talk to one another without the distraction of telephone, television, computer, etc.

• Walking together can reduce anxiety and make you feel calmer.

• Walking is good for your hearts.

• Walking can help you both lose weight.

• Walking can reduce any pain either of you may have in your lower-back.

• Aside from needing some comfortable walking shoes, walking is inexpensive.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST, November 8^th, 2012

HOW TO HAVE QUALITY TIME IN YOUR MARRIAGE:

Don't let your job or the kids or volunteer work or time with friends and extended family interfere with your marriage.

Many couples today find that being married doesn't guarantee that they will have quality time with one another. If you are both busy, you have to plan to spend time together. Here are some ideas.

Difficulty: Easy

Time Required: Varies

Here's How:

1.Schedule a weekend just for the two of you. Write it on your calendar, put it on your computer planner, etc. Don't change it for any other event. You don't have to go anywhere.

2.Have lunch together once a week. On nice days, meet in a park.

3.Let your children know that you two need time alone together. Tell them they can knock on your closed bedroom door only if there is blood.

4.Walk around the block together.

5.Do chores together like the dishes or weeding. It may not sound like quality time, but it can be.

6.When you are running errands together, turn off the radio or CD player in the car and talk with one another.

7.Take showers together.

8.Spend 20 minutes a day in daily dialogue.

9.Arrange for a quiet evening at home alone once a month.

10.Hire a babysitter to watch the kids for a couple hours even though you are home. This works wonders!

11.Work out a deal with another couple to have them watch your kids overnight so you can have a romantic evening alone ... then you watch their children for them.

12.Schedule dates with one another. Having an evening or afternoon out together twice a month is a good beginning.

13.Volunteer to be a presenting couple on Marriage Encounter, Retrouvaille or Engaged Encounter weekends.

14.When you travel together, don't take work on the plane or road trip. Spend that time talking with each other.

15.Have a one night stand with each other.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST: November 7th, 2012 Simple Ways that Say I Love You

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST: November 7^th, 2012

Ways to Say I Love You

 

The best ways to say "I love you" to your spouse are usually in simple, every day, seemingly unimportant ways.

Here are some suggestions on how to say “I love you” so that your love for one another goes on forever.

•Make sure you say "I Love You" at least once each day to your spouse.

•Write unexpected love notes.

•When your spouse asks for a favor, consider saying "as you wish."

•Give your mate an unexpected hug, a surprisingly romantic kiss, or a teasing tickle often.

•Be spontaneous and surprising with winking at each other, whisking your spouse away for an unexpected weekend alone, star-gazing together, taking a walk in the rain with one another.

•Share memories by looking at old photographs and talking about memories you share together.

•Schedule a day to just be leisurely together.

I’m happy to know that Darrell & I have done all of these things together & we continue these practices day in & day out.  I know he loves me by simple actions every day.  I am a lucky woman to have such an amazing man that is so thoughtful.  He respects our relationship and puts in first in his life just as God would have it.  These may seem like simple acts but they are HUGE acts of love that will make a difference in your relationship with your spouse.  Give them all a try today!

~Maria

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST

MORE GREAT TIPS!

These aspects of marriage (not listed in any type of priority) are listed as necessary for a long lasting marriage.

 • Continue to build intimacy -- both sexually and emotionally -- throughout your marriage.

• Create passion for life and for one another.

• Forgive one another. Don't hang on to past baggage and past hurts. Be willing to let go and to move forward with your lives.

• Continue to be committed to each other and celebrate your sense of commitment.

• Like one another and be friends with each other.

• Have fun together, laugh together, and use humor in healthy ways.

• Comfort, encourage, and affirm one another.

• Be able to stand on your own feet as a couple and not be dependent either financially or emotionally on either of your parents.

• Respect one another's need for privacy and space.

• Parent together.

• Deal with a crisis and adversity together.

• Fight fair.

• Accept your differences and don't try to change your spouse.

• Keep romance alive in your marriage.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST, Nov. 5, 2012

12 WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR MARRIAGE

• Be honest.

• Support one another's goals and achievements.

• Respect each other.

• Take time to share dreams and goals on a regular basis with your spouse.

• Consider daily dialogue as a means of improving your communication.

• Laugh together at least once a day.

• Fight fair.

• Be willing to forgive.

• Remember kindness towards each other is a great gift.

• Share your daily expectations.

• Make decisions about finances, disciplining the children, chores, vacations, etc., together.

• Take time to be alone together working on your intimacy. Schedule dates or romantic getaways.

 

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST

Every marriage needs help now and then, both during the good times and when things become difficult. Here are issues that impact marriages and skills to help you deal with those issues and problems in healthy ways. Remember that most problems have solutions. Don't ignore the problems and issues in your marriage. If your marriage is in trouble, get started and make the necessary changes together that will help your marriage be a successful, long lasting union.

For your marriage to last many years, it is important that you show your love for one another on a regular basis.

That means daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly, taking a few minutes, even seconds, to put your spouse first on your priority list.

DAILY:

Spend at least 10 minutes a day focused on one another without the distraction of your kids, the TV, the phone, etc.

Kiss your spouse in the morning, before leaving the house, when you go to bed, and several other times during the day and evening.

Say I Love You.

Hug your spouse several times each day.

Affirm something your spouse said or did and say something nice.

Be kind to your spouse.

Do something caring and romantic for your spouse.

Don't criticize your spouse.

Laugh together.

WEELY:

Hide some love notes for your spouse.

Do a few things together, like working in the yard, taking a walk, watching a favorite movie, or planning and cooking dinner.

Encourage both yourself and your spouse to have some alone time.

MONTHLY:

Plan and have a date night with one another.

YEARLY:

Celebrate your anniversary. Write a letter to each other recommitting yourselves to your marriage.

Decide together how you will celebrate holidays.

 Make a big deal about your birthdays.

GENERAL:

Fight fair.

 Don't try to change your spouse.

 Be willing to forgive.

 Don't expect your spouse to be a mind reader and don't try to be a mind reader.

Consider attending a marriage enrichment weekend or workshop.

Accept that there will be some small issues that you two will never resolve and that it is normal in successful marriages.

 We are just getting started with this series.  I’m so excited about this one.  It will be very in-depth and soul-searching.  So, definitely make notes about how you can start strengthening your marriage today!

~Maria

 

JEALOUSY SERIES, DAY 6:

FINAL DAY OF OUR JEALOUSY SERIES

How Can a Couple Handle Jealousy?

 Can jealousy be overcome? The answer is yes, but with great effort. Like most other difficult emotional experiences, jealousy, if treated correctly, can be a trigger for growth. It can become the first step in increased self-awareness and greater understanding both of your mate and of the relationship.

  •Admit your jealous behavior and accept that your jealousy is hurting your marriage.

 •Discuss the roots of your or your spouse's jealous feelings.

 •Don't spy on your spouse.

 •As a jealous spouse, make a decision to change your behavior. You may need to get individual counseling.

•Realize you can't control someone else.

 •Together, set fair ground rules that you can both live with.

 •If you are the non-jealous partner, don't lie or try to hide where you are or what you are doing.

 •Seek professional help as a couple.